Everyday i'd ask myself why.why why why. everyone knows im very unmotivated.tomorrow i have exams but its like at 1.35am im writing.tomorrow is economics mocks.if i want to be come a banker its quite an issue if i cant even study.but i digress.

the issue at hand is that if God wants to end the world, for his second coming, why cant he do it now?why cant he do it before i suffer for the rest of my life, having to study and do useless things like forcing myself to work hard and hope for the best in becoming a successful person?he has a point, because if i were more Godly, he'd bless me.

If i were more Godly things wouldnt be so difficult.
If i were more Godly, things would go my way.
If I were more Godly, I'd find more purpose in my life, gain more rewards in heaven for being one of God's little soliders that evanglise, no?

BUT.im not.so how?i cant freaking go to church cos its so freaking far. and having experienced being a good girl is like, i cant say i really want to.

Sure, i want to go to heaven.
Sure, i want to live in the big house for eternity and have all the rewards for everlasting life that i earned here on earth.

BUT . FUCK IT OK.end the world now can?!why must we spend all this useless time before You come.

If You came now,everything would be so much easier.